The days were so long but the week was so short.

This day will never end. Why are all the moronic people calling today, don't they know that is what Monday is for. The phone goes quiet and then lights up like a lightbright forming a freaky clown face at me. Thousands of Jack-in-the-boxes pop out all at once. I can't pick up the calls fast enough, they just keep coming. They just keep annoying. I can't handle one more dialogue like the following:

Them: "Is so and so there?"
Me: "They've stepped away from their desk, would you like to leave a voicemail for them?"
Them: "Maybe you can help me."

The eyes begin to roll back into my head.

But really I want to respond, "No. I can't help because I don't actually understand what this company does or how it works, so really you would be much better off leaving the voicemail as I suggested and waiting with baited breath for the response otherwise I will just give you some answer that I pull for the nether regions of my ass which will not satisfy either of us and leave me with a hand that smells like...well you know."

But bitterness aside, this day won't end. I think the world might end before this day. I think the mountains might crumb before the end of this day. But sorry folks, I don't think this blog will end before this day. I'm so bored. Someone entertain me. When I'm rich I am totally going to hire a court jester to entertain me.

I'm so bored that I really don't have anything to write but I am bored so I will write nonetheless. This last week the world has come to a stop or maybe just me. I'm standing still watching everything and everyone rotate around me. And no, I don't think the world revolves around me, I think it revolves without me.

Some one stop this plane, I want to get off. I always seem to pull the wrong cord on my parachute. Wouldn't it be weird if the regular shoot worked but the emergency shoot didn't. I know you wouldn't need the emergency shoot if the regular one work but it is just funny by definition. Sometimes I feel as though my emergency shoot is defective this worries me even though I not jumping off any planes.

Oh, someone just brought me a magazine to read. I'm so gone from this sad blackhole soul sucking of a place. But see you guys tomorrow, or Monday. Have a great weekend. That's assuming this day actually does end. That has yet to be seen.