Hello, I'm Old

And I am fine with that. I must say that I am relieved that the year of the quarter life crisis has concluded. I like to think that I wrapped it up with a bang by getting a holiday job at Crate and Barrel. It took all of fifteen minutes before she offered me that job, I know that it is sad when getting a job at a retail chain boost your self esteem, but it did. I feel like I am at least being proactive about life by trying to find solutions to minor problems that become major because they are ignored.

Once you admit that you are old rather than trying to hide from it, deny it, or not accept it, a certain amount of joy can be found. I feel as though a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I've always stressed about age because of expectations, not just those of society but mostly my interpretation of those imposed by society. If I disconnect myself from what I thought my life would be at this age. If I stop deeming myself a failure. If I realize that things will happen when they are meant to happen and when I am ready for them to happen. Then and only then can I find any semblance of happiness in this: age, moment, or life.

I feel anew. Once again it is like anything and everything is possible. I just have to believe and seek in order to find. Everyone always talks about how dirty the air is in LA, but today it seems crisp and clean to me because I am no longer polluting my mind or my being. I feel as though one chapter of my life is over and the other is about to begin.

Maybe all that I've said is just the birthday mind working, but I like to think that it is not since I am excited about my birthday and that is new to me. I usually despise my birthdays, that puts it mildly. Wow, even the bitchy co-workers are having no effect on me today. It just might be a new beginning after all. Hello, my name is Whitney. I'm old and mildly proud of it.